"How Not to Look Old"??

This chic passenger caught on her way to Cologne, Germany obviously needn't read the article....

I read an article today on the train entitled "How Not to Look Old". A young American woman kindly offered me her copy of "O" magazine (Oprah's) after noticing that I couldn't seem to get past the first few pages of the new and devastatingly boring book I was reading in over an hour. That was nice of her. I have never so much as even flipped through this magazine before and would never consider buying it, but I thought, what the hell? It had to be better than what I was reading, if only for it's bold capitalized print and color pictures.
As I sorted through the pages, I came across articles with titles such as "How to Support Your Adult Child" and "Oprah's Behind the Scenes Interview with Denzel," (wow) until I came across what I was looking for. The article was actually really great. It suggested ways that older women could pair outfits and wear makeup that would make them appear a bit younger. A pretty grey-haired model even modeled a few "hip" alternatives to the elastic waisted pants and penny loafers my precious golden oldies love so much.
The part that I have to disagree with though is their list of "25 Things That Have to Go". Two among the banned were mummus and Christmas sweaters. What?! Those are two of my favorite things to see little old ladies wearing!
Items on this list, editors must consider, are worn for completely practical reasons! How far down the street do you think grandma would get without those nude pantyhose with the reinforced toe? And she might just forget how many grandchildren she has if she didn't wear that necklace with charms representing all of them! Ok, mummus are probably the only ones on there without any practical value other than to send the simple message of "I don't give a fuck!" But then at their age, would you??